


Multiplicity Royale

by Kazekaitou



Category: Bishoujo Senshi Sailor Moon | Pretty Guardian Sailor Moon, Bishoujo Senshi Sailor Moon | Pretty Guardian Sailor Moon (Anime & Manga)
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2017-12-05
Updated: 2017-12-30
Packaged: 2019-02-10 22:07:26
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 4
Words: 13,134
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/12921213
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Kazekaitou/pseuds/Kazekaitou
Summary: When Usagi and Mamoru find their past counterparts residing in their heads, how will they reconcile their relationship when it is in two very different places?





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> So, I decided to do it. Write a Usa/Mamo romance. I’ve been inspired by tumblr boards and wonderful fan fiction out there, and the nickname is blatantly stolen/a nod to both FloraOne and UglyGreenJacket, not because I’ve actually said much to them, but because I love their works and all of a sudden I have AN IDEA and here is chapter one.
> 
> Thanks to The Rising Pheonix for Beating!

The first time Usagi knew something was different was because she found herself face to face with a Tokyo Police officer who was adamantly asking if she was okay.

It took her a second to get her bearings,  her chest has been wracked with sobs,  she was wearing a tight fitting dress that was way too formal and she wasn't quite sure how she'd ended up sobbing on this park bench in the middle of the night. A quick mental check of her body declared her uninjured, but disoriented.

She wiped her tears away with her hands and took deep breaths to try and quell the feeling something was terribly admiss.  

“I'm okay.” She choked out.  “Just a bad breakup.” That part was a lie,  but she couldn't think of anything else to explain why she was loudly sobbing in the deserted park.

The man stood up. “I'm sorry, but the park is closed. Do you need an escort out?”

Usagi shook her head. “I’ll manage on my own. I must have lost track of the time.” Lost track was really an understatement as she wasn't sure when, why or how she gotten here, or even what park she was at.

She stood up, looking around. “Could you show me the entrance?”

The police officer pointed and she was on her way.

Once she reached the entrance she caught her reflection in the closed gift shop window. She was wearing an ivory and gold ball gown, intricate lacing. It fit her perfectly,  but she was wondering where in the hell it came from.

She tried to detransform, maybe it was the disguise pen. The dress shimmered away into bunny pajamas. When had she used it? Why has she used it?

Either way,  it was clear the sun was starting to rise, and she needed to get home quick before her mom tried to wake her for the day. Slipping into the nearest alley,  she transformed into Sailor Moon to make the journey faster.

She made a note to ask everyone what was happening at school today,  but when she did no one had any answers.

The second time it happened,  she was sure she was going insane, and not because she was standing in ruins on the goddamn moon.

She wasn't sure how she got there. Or why she was there. She first thing she checked that her brooch was nestled against her chest.  The second thing was that the area looked undisturbed of monsters or other intruders,  just dust,  and rubble. The third was that the other Senshi were not with her.

She was dressed in something reminiscent of her time as Princess Serenity.

In the corner of her eye, she saw white roses carefully placed on a fallen pillar.

She walked closer,  carefully stepping over loose debris, unconsciously lifting the edge of the dress she was wearing

She took a sharp breath, this is where her past mother had died.

Someone had set up a small memorial. Dried flowers, a golden crescent moon marker and a neat folded letter.

She picked up the letter carefully unfolding it for clues.

‘That is not for you’ a voice in her head said too her, not a thought,  but specifically a direct command.

“What?” Usagi asked aloud. She continued to unfold the letter,  marvelling at the beautiful handwriting she immediately recognized as her past self, the handwriting painstakingly educated into her over years and years time.

‘I said it's not for you.’

“I clearly wrote this.” She stated into the stale motionless air. She was going crazy talking to herself.

‘No,   _I_ wrote it.’

“That's Princess, Serenity's handwriting,  and I AM Princess Serenity,  albeit a long time later.”

She heard a mental sigh. ‘Yes,  and no’

And that's when she realized her past self had somehow taken residence inside her head.

* * *

 

CHAPTER ONE

  Usagi stood in front of her mirror, getting ready for her Sunday- a meeting at the Hikawa shrine to discuss her current mental predicament. School was off, homework was done and the world had been peaceful. But, in the back of her mind was a critical eye. It had been startling the first time she’d looked in the mirror and felt distinctly that the person reflected wasn’t quite her. It wasn’t until the pieces started to come together, she understood that these thoughts were Serenity’s. While Serenity and her looked very similar, actually the differences were rather minute, the princess part of her mind saw all of them.

    Usagi was a bit shorter, with slightly darker skin. Her face was more expressive, and her eyes just a smidge too blue with less of the silvery tones. Princess Serenity would poke at her inhabited body, who hadn’t quite filled out through puberty; her face hadn’t lost its childlike features. Princess Serenity also had opinions that Usagi just simply did not hold her body in the same way. Usagi felt all of these thoughts and Serenity’s clear dissatisfaction, and the clear implication she was a _child._

Then there was the issue of clothes.

    Serenity just didn’t feel comfortable in anything other than a full length skirt or dress, preferably with some sort of lace. Usagi, on the other hand, felt floofy and modest in full length attire, and why wouldn’t she want to run around in something comfortable and stylish especially in spring. Besides, the looks Mamoru gave her when she thought she wasn’t looking were _fantastic_ and made her heart race.

    Usagi couldn’t afford, must less explain a sudden affinity to ballroom dresses, so she’d settled on the disguise pen as the default choice for Serenity's clothing if it was an absolute must (if they negotiated out something to wear at all. Serenity was really good at vocalizing displeasure and then doing absolutely nothing about it, which Usagi truthfully didn’t mind).

    After some consideration a pastel knee length blue skirt and white long sleeve silk white blouse were chosen as a compromise. Serenity insisted on adding a long gold necklace against the plain blouse. Usagi complied.

Usagi & Serenity  were both fearful of the upcoming senshi meeting, albeit for different reasons. Usagi fear that herself would be usurped by Serenity, Luna and the Senshi pushing her into a role she wasn’t ready for and didn’t need. Serenity on the other hand felt like she was an alien in a world where nothing was quite right. Even the familiar reincarnated faces, they were just like artistic impressions- they were similar but not the friends and family she had known. They just _weren’t,_ just like Usagi was not her. Navigating the expectation of people who were her court, but clearly were no longer her court was going to be heartbreaking and confusing. Add onto it overnight (when she had come into being she surmised) to go from one of the most well known people in the solar system to literally a world where the population didn’t know her kingdom had ever existed. On top of it not to be cooperating with her own/almost self, her body not her own.

    Usagi discovered pretty quickly that Serenity had opinions about everything in her new unfamiliar world and it gave Usagi a hesitancy when moving about. She tried to obstinately ignore it while running the streets of Tokyo ( _late again!)_ which suddenly felt too crowded, without enough nature about. The buildings so tall (when had she ever thought that buildings were tall). There was a new fascination with the skyline. A separate parallel thought process to her own that she could feel, that felt sort of like her own but absolutely distinct. 

    She was going to have headaches for the rest of her life.

Soon the temple came into view, and she rushed up the steps where everyone was waiting. Surprisingly even Setsuna had shown,  engaged in a discussion with a preteen Hotaru. Mamoru was waiting a little distance away leaning against an open door frame trying to look disinterested but Usagi knew he was paying attention to everyone while waiting for her. She gave him a big hug that Rei interrupted by stating her chiding about being on time. Meanwhile Serenity told Usagi through internal commentary that Royalty was always on time as nothing could start without them. Usagi filed this away for an argument on another day  but today was not it. Revealing that her past self was literally inside her head was going to cause enough problems.

Usagi watched as everyone settled into their routine spots on the top of the temple steps. The sun was out and bright, each in comfortable spring clothes for a nice peaceful day . Rei in contrast was in her traditional Miko outfit, carefully pressed red and white garb.  Haruka and Michiru sat affectionately close,  the inner senshi in their own half circle. Mamoru remained standing against the wall.

“Well,  you called the meeting so what's up?” Minako started bringing focus to the group . Everyone stopped their idle chitchat and turned towards her  two cats included.  Serenity silently observed from inside her head,  for the first time of the day not offering her opinion.

Usagi sighed and went back to trying to figure out how to explain.

“It is difficult to explain… But Princess Serenity is inside my head.”

“You have all your memories?” Luna asked first. Usagi looked down at the black cat who had settled into Minas lap right next to Artemis.

“Yes, and no.  I don't. She does in my head.”

“What do you mean she?”

“I don't know, she's just there. One day I woke up in a, different in place with no idea how I got there…”

“Like possession!” Michiru proclaimed and three outer senshi (Pluto hadn't moved)  looked ready to transform.

“No, not like possession . I'm clearly here and clearly Usagi…or at least I feel that way...”

Mamoru started . “Think of it as two personalities in the same body. Neither are dominate per say,  though I can't say i've seen Princess Serenity running around as of late.”

“That's because she hates Tokyo.” Usagi answered simply.

Mamoru straightened a little bit and started speaking “Adjusting to Modern Day Tokyo can be difficult,  I would know Ren.”

Usagi felt herself almost yanked back an observer of her own actions as Serenity took over.

“Please, tell me you are actually here like me. “

Serenity moved too close to Mamoru peering into his sky blue eyes,  looking for some sign of hope.

Mamoru looked around the room,  eight pairs of eyes watching . “Let's talk somewhere more private?”

“Answer the question first or there is no need.”

Mamoru sighed.  “Yes,  and to the gardens.”

Mamoru led Usagi down the steps and under a tree, still in the sights of the Senshi bit far enough away they couldn't hear.

“Endymion… how long have you been here?  Usagi had no idea add far as I can tell.”

“Is Usagi listening?”

“Intently.”

“Probably clearly since Beryls defeat, so I'm guessing a year and a half? I was around before then,  but Mamoru and I weren't working together... so things are more sketchy. What about you?”

Serenity nodded. “A few weeks at most,  enough to know I hate it here. You have no idea how relieved I am to have you....”

She turned to face him,  looking up at his square chin and beautiful eyes.  “Even if you're a little more… scrawny in this life.” Serenity gently ran a single finger down his chest,  stopping just before his belly button,  making a silly distasteful face that Endymion wanted dearly to laugh at.

Mamoru/Endymion took in a surprised breath at her forward touch,  gently taking her hand in his own to stop the warmth invading his thoughts.

“Well,  I hope the Princess can forgive me that this body didn't grow up wearing chainmail armor and carting broadswords. It does something special to the physique. Though, I should say, that you're also a little different.”

She huffed. “I've _noticed. ”_

Their faces had somehow ended up inches apart, their voices dropping in volume try her closer they were.

“I don't mind at all.” He murmured closing the gap between the two of them.

The kiss was electrifying and desperate filling the space between times and reconnecting their souls. With the powerful feelings came back the intense contrast of Serenity feelings of displacement, loss and grief . She found herself sobbing against his chest,  her hands gripping his black shirt.

Endymion simply enveloped her into a hug, and let her cry.  “When I came to in this world the past didn't seem that long ago,  is it the same for you?”

“It feels like just a few days ago in my head. Usagi is so certain it was so long ago… I just can't comprehend it. And the Senshi are all so different”

“They are also very similar even if you haven't seen it yet.”

“Usagi is clearly not me.”

Endymion shrugged.  “Not to me.”

Serenity sighed. “I need to live with you.”

“What?!”

“I said,  I need to live with you. I don't belong in Usagi’s world.”

Mamoru gently pushed Serenity away from his chest to look into her eyes,  still full of tears. “Ren,  Usagi is 15. She has a family.”

“You're the only person _I_ have left!”

“It isn't easy, but this isn't our lifetimes.  Why we’re here I have no idea,  but they have to live their lives we can't just upend it.”

Serenity paused. She could feel Usagi’s… was that embarrassment?... feelings beneath the tide of her own feelings.  She still felt the warmth of Endymion's chest,  the smell of pine and earth, the presence that made everything a little less bleak in this world. “I…”

“Okay,  lovebirds!” A shout came from on top of the stairs,  and each turned to see Minako’s waving her hands to get their attention.  “While it's great you are having a reunion,  we'd like to know what is going on up here!”

Endymion sighed.  Serenity asked “Is she always that energetic?”

“In her past life that energy just went into her determination to keep you out of too much trouble, while simultaneously egging you on.”

“I miss them.” Serenity took Endymions hand and walked back up the steps. For the first time since her arrival she felt like there was a little piece of familiarity to cling too.

Somewhere along the walk back up Usagi was out again in the forefront. “Mamo-chan? Why didn't you tell me he was there… in your head?”

“I just didn't want to give you expectations that you weren't ready to have.”

“I'm still not ready.”

“Don't worry,  I know you are still Usagi,  and that is just as important as your past self.”

“Do you really think so?”

“I really do."

For as many stairs as the temple had, the top came too soon for Usagi. She waved nervously as if greeting them for the first time today. “I really don’t know what to say.” She admitted, looking at Mamoru as if he could fill in some of the blanks for her.

That was when Serenity caught Setsuna’s eyes, as if seeing her for the first time. And Usagi felt rage. Unmoored, unabated rage.

Usagi swallowed, trying to focus on her feelings and ignore the overwhelming urges in her head. But Serenity was not letting go, and suddenly Usagi found herself watching once again. It was almost as if watching a first person movie, hearing words after they were said, and then suddenly recognizing them as _your own_. But distinctly as a surprize as if there was no control at all, no planning,  no forethought.

Serenity walked directly up to Setsuna, who looked like she was regretting not being transformed into Sailor Pluto in that moment. Serenity, even being shorter was clearly using her body language to indicate she was in control and infuriated. Somehow Serenity’s hands remained by her side, in tight balled fists. Usagi could feel her fingernails burrow into her skin.

“Why?!”

Setsuna took a step back to increase distance, which Serenity quickly closed. Usagi wasn’t sure if it was old habits, or her imposing figure, but Setsuna carefully replied “Why what your highness?”

“Don’t play coy with me. I want answers. You had to have known what was going to happen! Why?!”

Setsuna bowed her head. “Who do you think started a whole forbidden love prophesy, Princess Serenity?”

Serenity froze. “Love doesn’t destroy a kingdom. Secrets _do._ We needed to know! To stop it, to stop Metalia!”

“I scoured the timelines for alternatives. I spent so long looking for a way, any way!”

“You didn’t look hard enough!”

“Time is of no consequence - I put as much effort as I could! This timeline is the _best_ one I found.”

“I don’t  believe you!”

“Please, Serenity just take comfort in knowing whatever choices you made- they wouldn’t have made a difference. The moon kingdom was going to fall. Be it Metalia, or another evil, it was going to fall. I could maybe get a few hundred years in one direction, but at the cost of the whole solar system, or the lineage, or the Silver Crystal. Long term _it didn’t matter._ It was doomed. ”

“Then why the prophecy in the first place?”

“Because I was naive enough to try!”

Serenity felt a strong hand on her shoulder. It could only be Mamoru’s who she turned. “Don’t…”

“Ren, stop. Leave Setsuna alone. It is a thousand years past. It doesn’t feel that way to you today, but it is a thousand. years. ago.”

“It is MY KINGDOM!”

The other senshi had been watching this exchange unfold not quite sure exactly if they should intervene or how. Setsuna wasn’t the type to need defending, but none of them had actually seen anyone directly question her authority before.

Serenity paused enough to take a breath, eyes darting between Mamoru’s and Setsuna’s who was wise enough to stay still and not say a word. In the moment, Serenity read her silence as utter remorseless guilt. Endymion’s attempt at emotional regulation was another type of betrayal in her mind, that he _didn’t_ understand her, and after all, they were standing on _his planet_ . The only thing that had survived. 

Her rage boiled into fierce helplessness, and she was overwhelmed by feeling. She knew her words were inadequate,too sudden and bound to cause more harm (her mother had taught that all words are to be chosen carefully).

“I need to go.” Serenity said suddenly, she headed down the steps as quickly, without bolting, as she could.

Usagi, watching this from inside herself, mentally clawed through feelings to not go too far away (not that Serenity had any idea where to go) an intimate personal observer trying to take back control. ‘Please, just breathe!’

‘Oh, like you’re the bastion of self control!’ Serenity thought bitterly.

‘At this moment I’m way calmer than you are!’

‘You should care about this! About all of it! You know what we lost!’    

‘And I do care, but whatever you are going through it isn’t what is actually happening _now_ . _’_

They found themselves in the nearest park, Serenity looking up through the trees towards a blue clear sky. Her eyes scanned for the moon, (though really she half expected the Earth) but neither were visible through the sunshine of the day. Her eyes began to blur with tears and she found herself sobbing against and old tree.

Usagi didn’t know what to even think along for the ride. She reached out calming, peaceful thoughts but had no idea if Serenity could even perceive them among the waves of unadulterated sorrow.

It was a long time before Serenity was tired enough that Usagi could walk them home.


	2. Chapter 2

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A/N: Huge Thanks to The Rising Phoenix for her encouragement, beta and scheming discussions.
> 
> The response for this fic has been surprisingly great, but I’m sure I can do better. So, review, comment, ask questions, suggest, critique! PM me, tumblr me @ Everythingelsewithoutreason, bug me. Hope you enjoy!

Family life had become complicated for Usagi. Actually, it wasn’t complicated per say, her family was exactly the same as it had ever been, but the feelings around family had become punctuated with a stream of confused feelings from her fellow internal observer: Serenity.

Prior to duplicity, Usagi had some sense of the depth of her own feelings- and had been told by so many people over the years to reign in her expression, control her thoughts, hold back her tears, quiet her excitement. The list really was innumerable, depending on the situation and the company.  Now, having herself in her head (finding the wording for these things is rather difficult after all) it was clear that somehow not acting on feelings did not decrease their depth, and that it was somehow possible to fit more contradictory feelings than she ever thought possible in one single body. While Usagi had boldly, to the dismay and judgement of most, expressed, moved and continued.Serenity’s life, punctuated with prospects of high stakes encounters and political entrapment, forced her to carve out her own ways of processing mostly in the absence of others. But she retained power and identity through her desire to not comply to the rigidity of her position. Serenity and Usagi never conformed.

Maybe in this way, they were the most alike.

But that also meant that Serenity was not about to adapt to Usagi, the modern day, to duality and Usagi’s family so different than her own.  And Usagi wasn’t about to change breakfast to avoid Serenity’s feelings about the situation.

Serenity had feelings about everything involved: the food, Ikuko’s sweet reminders and encouragement, Shingo’s ever teasing banter, and Kenji’s quiet comments and stern reminders of civility when things derailed to much.

This morning Serenity was focused primarily on observing Ikuko. Ikuko moved through her house with an unnatural cheer, celebrating each day as special, cheering her children into whatever the day may hold. Serenity admired her energy, the joyfulness in the Kitchen, the small doting questions and her genuine interest in the smallest of details of banal adolescent life. Serenity also found surprise in the way Usagi and Ikuko’s interacted, their expressions bouncing off each other, encouraging, playful and interested. It required some reflection experiencing a life outside of her own, but also amplified the clear and  loss of her own mother.

Usagi continued her defense of school grades while Serenity pondered depth of familial relationships, the contrast wide and incredibly distracting.

“Mooom, I _did_ study with Ami and she’s the top student in the school!”

“Being in the same room while Ami is studying does not mean you actually studied Usagi.”

“Ami is far too disciplined to let me just sit there! I’ve _tried_!” Usagi continued to eat her eggs quickly as she would have to leave for school soon to be anywhere close to on time.

“I’m glad at least someone in your life is a good influence on your education.”

Usagi grumbled, but did not have much of a reply, as she continue to finish her breakfast. ‘ _Really?’ ‘_ Came Serenity’s voice.  ‘ _Don’t you start too! School is hard!’_ Came Usagi’s retort. ‘ _We’ll just see about that._ ’ ‘ _Oh, like you’ll have an interest! You hate it here as it is!’_

“Usagi?” Her mom waved a hand in front of her.

“Huh?”

“Welcome back to Earth, dear. You’re about to be late.” _‘What kind of phrase is that?!’_

“Bye Mom, Dad, Shingo.”

‘ _Lunch!’_ “Usagi! Lunch!!” Came both her mother and Serenity’s reminder, as Usagi grabbed her lunch bag and ran out the door.

   The school morning was long and boring. There was simply too much information and the doubling distracting Serenity’s opinions on said information Usagi was ready to refuel and have some relaxing moments with her closest friends. Usagi practically skipped outside for Lunch.

She was the first to make it to the courtyard tree that was their designated meeting space,  plopped down and opened her bag. A few moments passed as she savored a rice ball and she realized Ami, Makoto and Minako had't shown up and she didn’t see them in the courtyard. That could only mean one thing.

They were talking about her.

She contemplated leaving the spot behind and entertaining herself with her other classmates lunchtime antics, catching up with Naru, teasing Unimo, finding out the latest gossip where no one would have any doubts to her being just Tsukino Usagi. No awkward conversations, or expectations, no explaining every second of her internal dialogue to friends, and bonus, Serenity wouldn’t have a single opinion about any of them, unlike the Senshi.

“Usagi?” Minako’s voice called out interrupting her thoughts.  

    Usagi decided to play dumb and not mention their few minute absence, hopefully to avoid talking. “Minako, come try the onigiri my mom made!”

    She held out her bento, carefully packed with small rice balls with some unspecified fillings.

Minako plucked one out before sitting next to Usagi and stretching out her legs, and taking a bite with an enthusiastic nod.

Ami took her place on the other side of Usagi. “So, last night I did some research…”

“No no no. I don’t want to talk about this right now. I want to enjoy my lunch and the sunshine.”

    “Usagi…You didn’t quite give us time to discuss yesterday.” Makoto gently reminded her.

“I’m sorry my past self was busy being angry” Usagi rolled her eyes. “But, I’m not talking about it.”

“I’ve never seen Setsuna look so...”

    Usagi interrupted. “I don’t care.” The steadiness of her voice, and the clipped direct tone was clearly not Usagi. All three of the Senshi looked at her in a stunned silence.

After a moment, Minako pointed out  “You clearly do.“

Usagi shrugged and started to eat her last Onigiri, not even acknowledging she was back to Usagi, or worrying to explain to the others. “I’m going to go talk with Naru, find out what’s going on with her if you won’t let me relax.”

“That is neither here nor there. Ami, has information to share. It is important you listen.” Luna’s voice. When did  that cat get into the tree? Usagi looked up in the lowest branches to see Luna perched, tail flicking. Usagi knew that was a sure sign she was annoyed.

“Luna, I’m exhausted.” She dramatically slumped over as proof of her exhaustion. “My hair is even tired.”

“I would think that you would be able to take a lesson from Princess Serenity and be able to sit through an extremely important conversation.”

Usagi threw her empty bento back into her bunny bag, and stood up. She was now about eye level with Luna. “I am not Serenity. I’m Tsukino Usagi, and I’d like some time to relax before afternoon session.” Usagi walked off. After a few moments, she started enthusiastically waving her hands and yelling “Naru!” to catch her friend’s attention. The other senshi watched as she gave Naru a huge hug, and fell into a animated conversation about Naru’s most recent boyfriend. Once they were sure she was out of earshot, Minako asked,  “Do you think she realizes she’s already being more direct?”

Each of them shook their heads.

The second half of the school day didn’t go well, but finally ended. Usagi bolted out the door with barely a ‘goodbye’ and thankfully Mamoru waiting at the school gate. Usagi (still mad about everyone wanting to talk about the _princess)_ and Serenity (still mad that everyone was not their past selves) was grateful for the patient, calming presence of Mamoru who somehow managed to be supportive and make neither one of them feel crazy.

Usagi practically sprinted to him, grabbing him in a big hug.

“Well, Hi there.”

“You have no idea how long today was, and Ami, Minako and Makoto won’t leave me alone.”

“What do you want to do this afternoon?”

“Honestly?”

“Yes, honestly.”

“I want to go somewhere quiet. Serenity wants to talk to you anyway, so I was thinking your place?”

“Sounds like a plan to me.”

After a brisk walk that Serenity peppered questions about how Tokyo worked, they came up to the tall apartment building Mamoru lived in.

    Serenity looked at Mamoru as he pushed a button waiting for the elevator. She looked at it in distaste.

    “What floor do you live on?”

    “The 30th.”

“Can we just...teleport?”

He laughed. “Its really not that bad once you get use to it. Think of electricity as its own form of magic if it helps.”

“It is clearly a metal box held by wires. I’d rather teleport through space than hover in the air by a metal _string._ ”

“Then let Usagi do it, she’s been in the elevator countless times.”

Serenity blinked a few times, followed by a sigh. “I’m not here to do things that Serenity doesn’t want to do! I was here first.”

‘Actually, I was born first.’ Came the mental reply.

“Give her time to adjust.”

“What about me? I’m not adjusting either!” The elevator doors opened and they stepped in. “School was just constant chatter about how much _better_ she is than me! How _different_ things are. How _undisciplined_ I am. I’m sick of it already! Then she kept telling me I’m writing wrong, when she writes ancient japanese, and my teacher was trying to figure out how come I knew these obscure characters that no one ever writes anymore! And, its is clearly wrong so I’m getting the ‘Usagi will never be fully literate speech from my teacher’, and she’s pouting it is wrong because it is not like she remembered. I’m trying to keep track of out here” She pointed around the elevator  “and in here!” pointing at her head.

“You two will have to just work together. You are two sides of the same coin.”

Usagi huffed. “It doesn’t feel like it.” The elevator dinged for the 30th floor.

“How did you manage this by yourself without going insane?”

    Mamoru/Endymion paused “That is a complicated question, actually.”

    Usagi looked at Mamoru whose hands had found their way into his pockets, a telltale sign he was a little nervous. “Why?” After a moment he started fishing for his keys.

“You have to understand... _both_ of you have to understand when this started happening to me that I was completely alone. That we were fighting an intergalactic evil, I had no memories of a childhood at all. Endymion might not have had Chiba Mamoru’s memories, but he had _something_  and that was so…” He looked far away as he opened the door.

“So... what?” Usagi leaned against him to comfort him. They moved to the couch and sat down together.

“Meaningful. ”

Usagi intertwined her hands in his, and her knack for understanding others shone through. “You felt lost and he provided direction.”

“Exactly.”

“I feel Serenity is just derailing…” Usagi trailed off and Serenity transitioned back out. “I’m not purposely trying to do anything to anyone! I’m just here. ”

“Of course not. It is a weird place to be.”

“Is it true you don’t remember your earth childhood? The second one I mean?”

“Yes. It is complicated.”

“Is that why your apartment is so… sparse?”

“Do you not like it?”

“It is just so…practical.”

“I’ve had enough extravagance for all my lifetimes. All of that was just...flourish”

Serenity laughed. “Then why do you fight with Usagi while wearing a tuxedo and a cape?”

“A man needs to be dashing to find and then protect his love.”

They were facing each other on the couch. Serenity leaned in quietly stating, “You have always been dashing...and daring. I’m so glad you are just...you.” and then Serenity leaned in for a kiss.

Serenity poured so much emotion into that kiss- her relief at him being there. She kissed him to override the unpleasantness of the present-day. She focused on his warm soft lips, the way he  moved under her hands as she reached for his shirt pulling him closer to her. She needed him more than ever, and craved his touch, she wanted to forget that this world was wrong and while she was with him everything felt just as it should be. She intensified her kissing, slipping and a hand under is shirt to feel his skin when he clearly pushed her away with a half bewildered look on his face.

“Serenity, no.”

“Why in the world not?” She was breathless and utterly confused.

    He sighed. “Because we haven’t…”

    “Not even once?”

    “Usagi is fifteen, Serenity. No, we haven’t. She’s just not ready for that.”

    “But…”

“Its an absolute no until Usagi is ready. Period. It doesn’t matter and I’m not arguing this with you.”

“But I…”

“You remember our first time?”

“Of course.”

“You only did it- and I remember how angry I was when I found out- to make your court acknowledge your relationship with me, and force the issue of marriage. It wasn’t because you were ready- you used it as a tool so our relationship had a future. If we had time…”

“It was complicated...First and foremost, I knew that I loved you and that I wouldn’t ever be with anyone else. Secondly, Timing was _wrong,_ but I had no doubts about us. Thirdly, It was to ensure that my mother couldn’t marry me to anyone else. Ever.”

“I just wished it had happened with no strings attached, not because you were determined to prove something as a catalyst.”

“It wasn’t to prove, it was to _ensure_ because I couldn’t bear losing you.”

“It's funny,  you two. Your the opposite of most people I have ever met. So willing to give the totality of your heart without  question,  but the physical aspect of relationship lags far behind.  Both of you were ready to die for me before you would even consider anything more than a chaste kiss.” He paused,  but Serenity didn’t respond.  So he continued.  “I would have rather you waited for you. Queen Serenity, despite her few flaws with ruling a Kingdom, your mother was one of the most sensitive people I had ever _known_ . Clearly she saw _something_ negative to come from our relationship. I don't think she outright rejected it because she couldn’t see the love between us. In fact, I know she saw the love between us. And I saw that she truly didn't want to stand in our way.”

Serenity nodded. “But she did.”

“ _But_ , one: she was a mother. Her...hesitation/resistance for her child to engage in an inter-planet affair was completely normal. Two: She wouldn't have stood in our way if there wasn’t a good reason...In hindsight, the Negaverse was a pretty damn good reason.”

“We could have handled it, _together_! If only Pluto had-”

“Had _what,_ Serenity? Had Pluto done _what_?”

“She **_betrayed us!_ ** _Betrayed me, my mother, our Kingdom!”_

Endymion sighed. “No, she did exactly as she was suppose to do.”

“She did not!” Serenity argued back.

“Serenity,we were both clearly dead. I know you remember dying. But here we are 1,000 years later having a conversation about if a time guardian could have saved the kingdom.”

“She should have.”

“No!” Came Endymion’s firm reply. “At the end of the day, all Pluto did was ensure that in some way, shape, or form, just like your mother had - had ensured that we _survived_ ,...and thrived.”

    Serenity sat back. “I wouldn’t call this thriving.”

    Endymion sighed. “Ask Usagi about Crystal Tokyo.”

    “What is that?”

    “A glimpse into our future.”

Serenity closed her eyes, for the first time searching through memories. A pink haired girl. A Crystalline Kingdom. 30th Century Tokyo.  Was it true? Was that Pluto’s endgame the entire time? Was her naive prophecy, the one she shared with her solely for their survival?...   

Serenity rubbed her temples, closing her eyes. Serenity had much to think about after all.  
    Mamoru continued with his perspective. “If Setsuna is one thing, it is purposeful. She wouldn't have done what she didn't think was right, if it meant everyone be destroyed...if it meant there weren't a chance...She wouldn't have done it if she didn't see hope in the future.”

 Endymion and Serenity stared into the other’s eyes.

“I hate to admit it that you might be right.” Came the soft acknowledgement as she looked away. After a moment, she sighed. “One day, I’m going to have to apologize aren’t I?”

“Good thing she is patient.” He teased.

Serenity rubbed her blue eyes with her hands. “Ugh, I don’t know why I am so tired.”

“Well, this does seem like a lot of work.”

“Will you just hold me for a little while?” She leaned against his chest, strenching across the couch. She suddenly felt enveloped inhis arms, listening to his steady, strong heartbeat. She breathed in deep, closing her eyes. It could have been so much more- Serenity knew this, but also knew not to push in this particular moment.

“What time do you need to be home?”

“By 9:30.”

“Has Usagi done her homework?”

“No, but we'll copy it tomorrow in exchange to talk about this stuff, I guess.”

“Negotiation tactics?”

“Seems like a good idea to me.”

“Is Usagi on board?”

“It is not hard to convince her to spend time with you, AND to get out of homework.”

Mamoru laughed. Serenity relished the sound of his voice from where she sat, and quickly fell asleep.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Please Review!


	3. Chapter 3

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A/N Note: Mentions of Japanese History in the Early 1600's. I use the English terms in the fic, but in case you wanted to google or learn more the Japanese terms are: Tokugawa bakufu (徳川幕府) and Sekigahara no Tatakai (關ヶ原の戰い). I kept the history lesson brief, but if you feel there is a mistake please let me know and I'll correct it.

Serenity never imagined encountering an evil so powerful it could blot out the earth from the sky. That her kingdoms ambience could be reduced to noises of bloodshed: screaming, yelling, and other sounds of anguish. She couldn't have imagined that the white iridescent marble could be stained with blood.

Waiting- trapped, protected had been awful. As the heiress, with no powers of her own, she was forced to be protected and disengaged but the most of war filtered in. And then the guards started to thin out, having been assigned elsewhere in desperation of covering the entire palace. The sky, black as midnight on a clear mid day, her senshi power attacks not a beacon of hope, but a sign of their struggle. And those led to silence.

She knew, the moment that her Senshi's lights of power did not dent the battleground that she was going to die, that it was just a matter of time.

Then Endymion appeared sword in hand, standing between her and death.

And she appeared, Beryl.

Her balcony. Her castle. Their last stand.

It was so slow then so sudden, and he was dead and her mind started to scream in heart wrenching despair and Beryl was looming to take her life too and in a last moment of defiance Serenity knew she wasn't going to give Beryl the satisfaction of taking her life as well. If she has anything it was her own will and she would not wait for death one second longer.

She picked his sword next to his body and plunged it into herself.

She woke up screaming, guttural, uninhibited screams, shooting out of bed.

She immediately looked down, expecting a blood stained dress punctured by a sword. She expected to be quickly bleeding out, and she could still feel the indescribable overwhelming pain.

"Usagi!" Luna cried, but Serenity was too out of it to realise Luna was referring to _her_.

But she saw pink bunny pajamas. She heard nothing but silence. No menacing laughter, no screams of pain - nothing.

She lifted the top to be sure as she was overcome by a wave of toppling nausea. No scar, no wound. Whole.

She barely made it to the bathroom, emptying her stomach while trying to keep her abundant blonde hair out of the way.

"Oh honey!" A voice, and suddenly gentle hands pulling her hair back. After a moment her body transitioned to dry heaves and slowly stopped. Her eyes were blurred with tears and she realized her whole body was shaking.

Luna was near her feet.

"Usagi, honey, are you okay?"

Serenity met concerned brown eyes of Usagi's mother as she tried to straighten herself to have some dignity in front of this stranger -just an instinctual reaction on her part.

Serenity nodded. "A… A nightmare."

"That must have been some nightmare by the way you were reacting. Let's go downstairs and let meet make you something to drink. Hotchocolate? Warm Milk? Tea?"

"Tea, please." Ikuko embraced her which Serenity felt obliged to try and return though it felt so awkward and weird but familiar and warm. "Shh, honey, it was just a nightmare. You are okay. "

Her mother in this situation would have just known her. Her favorite tea would be made, and she would have started humming that slow peaceful melody she did only in company of family. Her favorite blanket would have been wrapped around her shoulders, and soft reassurances would be given.

But Ikuko wasn't Queen Serenity, just like Serenity wasn't Usagi. But the company and tea would do, because she definitely wasn't about to close her eyes again. She reached into her mind and found Usagi's presence, also focused on calming her down. It must not feel as real to her Serenity thought.

She padded down the stairs,Ikuko in front, and sat down on the living room couch, trying to convince her breathing to settle back to normal, and her hands to stop shaking.

Luna jumped on her lap, and Serenity mindlessly pet her. "Luna…" She wasn't really sure what to say. The cat had flummoxed her since she had appeared in this world, and Usagi had been having a hard time with Luna expecting Usagi to be more like Serenity. She cat leaned against her, not speaking.

Ikuko returned with tea. "Sugar?"

Serenity shook her head. "No thank you." Serenity politely declined reaching for the warm ceramic mug.

She heard Usagi in her mind 'No no no,now she's really going to worry!'

Serenity did like sugar in her tea, but had been taught to never inconvenience in polite company and habits were hard to break. She couldn't see Ikuko as anything other than a polite stranger.

Then Ikuko sat next to her.

"Usagi, are you sick?" She checked her forehead for a fever.

"No, I just had a nightmare." She brushed the hand away. "I'm sorry to wake you. I didn't mean…"

"We can't control our dreams. Must have been some nightmare though. Do you want to talk about it?"

Serenity shook her head, bringing the hot tea to her nose and smelling the soft Jasmine flowers. She took a sip.

"Sometimes it helps to talk...what happened?"

"I died."

Usagi's voice came through loud and clear in her head. 'NO! She's massively superstitious about these things…'

"It could be an omen. How did you die?"

' _Don't you tell her'_ was the clear command from Usagi. ' _Last time I lied and said I choked and she pureed my food for over a week!'_

' _This has happened to you before?'_

' _Yes, after facing Beryl I had nightmares for weeks!' 'You what?' 'She's dead now.'_ Serenity tried to process that information but didn't get far.

"Usagi?"

"I don't really remember, but it was terrifying."

"Oh, then we will have to be extra careful!"

Serenity looked in surprise, and Usagi came to the forefront. "Mooooom, it was just a dream. Not real, no reason to panic. I'm fine. See?" Usagi then wiggled her hands and feet in example. "Perfectly alive."

"But the tea?"

"Oh, it clearly needs sugar. I don't know what I was thinking. It's almost like I was someone else for a minute there!" she laughed nervously.

Her mom took the tea away and returned with sweetened tea a second later.

"If you are okay, I'm going to return to bed. Is that okay?"

"Yeah, mom I'm okay I promise. Love you."

"Love you too. No dying?"

"I promise mom, absolutely no dying."

She heard Ikukos feet go back up the stairs.

"Luna, do you know what time it is?

"It's about five. Are you okay?"

Usagi sighed. "It is just Serenity's memories… I thought I remembered but clearly not the level of detail she remembers." Usagi shuttered.

"You are the same."

Usagi sighed "No! No we are not Luna. I'm meeting with everyone this morning to talk about this and I need you to listen that we are _different. I'm still U-sa-gi."_

Luna didn't respond. Usagi stood up with a yawn. "I don't think I'm going to go back to sleep. I'm going to go get ready and grab a coffee or something. See you at Ami's at seven."

Usagi showed up first to Ami's and didn't miss the approving nod. Usagi, holding the largest to go coffee she could find sipped with a glare. "Just give me your homework to copy, That was the deal."

Ami sighed, "you know this won't help you in the long run…"

"I don't care."

Usagi scribbled out answers of her math homework as the other inner senshi showed. All look displeased at the before school meeting, in various states of waking up. Each was slightly surprised that Usagi had actually made it.

"So, as I said before...I did some reading Usagi."

"Yeah?"

"So, the closest thing on earth that's documented about multiple personalities is a condition called Dissociative Identity Disorder, which you clearly don't have."

Usagi raised an eyebrow. Am I continued. "That condition comes primarily from highly traumatic childhoods, and is generally thought of as a coping mechanism to deal with severe instability in a living situation, combined with difficulty with attachment, usually due to terrible caregivers. Attachment is basically the ability to trust and relationship building."

"So that part doesn't apply." Rei stated. "No, but the ideas in treatment theoretically could. There are two arguing modalities. One is called integration which is the idea that the different parts of the mind can become one with communication and working together essentially becoming a single personality. The other is Co-Consciousness, or the idea that the two personalities can still feel or be different, but communicate effectively enough to act as one being. Perception wise, on the outside no one would really know the difference. But Usagi would still be able to identify both parts. They would work together at the same time without confusion, or timeloss. There is the idea that they work together for the whole body, not just in their own perceived desires which makes it co-conscious."

"We are dramatically different."

"Yes, it feels that way. But you are in fact in the same body, and you are reincarnations of eachother. We've seen you fight as Sailor Moon and actually become the princess. You can't actually be all that different."

Usagi shook her head. "I don't know if either of those suggestions are possible."

Ami instead of fighting, decided to change the subject slightly. "Would you be willing to answer some questions for me?"

"I guess."

"Do you guys talk to each other?"

"Yes, she's talking to me all the time!"

"Do you have each other's memories?"

"Yes and 's she's thinking it, I can clearly know. Yesterday, Mamoru asked her about Crystal Tokyo, and with the key word she could find the information in my brain, but without it she had no idea. It… it is like a library of books. If I don't look, or don't know what I'm looking for, I just know that there are a whole bunch of nameless memory books."

"What about skills?"

"We do different things, I haven't been able to do anything she can do, or the other way around. We argue alot about the current moment though."

"Here." Minako held out a bracelet, one half was navy blue with a silver line, and the other was side was silver with a blue line.

"Whats this for?"

"For our sanity. The mostly silver is for Serenity, and the mostly blue is for you. Whichever one of you is out, keep that side up and turn it around if you change. That way, we know who we are talking too. It is too confusing otherwise."

"Huh, thats a good idea. We like it. " Usagi but the blue side face up. Usagi's noticed the unintentional plural. She glanced down at the bracelet Minako had given her - blue side up...Could they be right? The bracelet after all was proof that something was different. But determined Usagi continued "But, I really want you to understand that I am me. Just me. I am really no different than two weeks ago. And I'm tired of the comments and additional expectations. I nor Serenity, is expecting you to live like your past selves, including you Luna." Usagi gave her cat a look.

"Would it be helpful if we were?" Ami asked.

Serenity laughed bitterly in Usagi's head. Usagi could tell it was more about grief than anything else. Usagi ignored her.

Usagi shook her head more to clear it than to emphatically say no. "You guys are just you. And we're doing just fine!"

"What about Serenity?"

Usagi took a gulp of her coffee, today was going to be long. "She doesn't think you can be."

"Ouch." Was Minako's reply.

After a moment of awkward silence, Ami directed the group "We should get going to school to be there on time."

"But I'm so tired." Usagi whined, gathering her things with the others.

The school day inched forward. Serenity and Usagi spent idle time spinning the new bracelet, which caused her in the know Senshi classmates to give her looks from time to time. Though Usagi really was hating the attention, a new bracelet was too tempting to fiddle with. Serenity just felt like trolling and continued the spinning, as Makoto, Minako and Ami were hyper aware of the tiny action.

'Just leave them alone will you?' Usagi mentally commanded.

'You are fiddling too'

'But you are doing it on purpose.'

Saito sensei droned on about the beginning of the Tokugawa Shogunate marked by starting in year 1600 at the battle of Battle of Sekigahara on October 21st 1600.

Serenity spinned the bracelet. 'This has to be the worst way to learn history.' she thought to Usagi who had pretty much settled into daydreaming and continuing her long standing tradition of ignoring the entire Edo period.

'Well how did you learn it?'

'The way to learn history is by talking to the time guardian herself'

'Setsuna never mentioned… '

'It isn't quite a glamorous role being the official historian of a kingdom. But, being able watch pieces of the timeline to understand is an invaluable service and allows for a greater understanding of how conflict arises… '

'No lecture on top of lectures!' Usagi spun the bracelet.

'I don't understand how Earth never managed to consolidate power…'

'Ugggh…' Spin.

"Tsukino! Stop playing with your bracelet and pay attention. Now who was in control of the western clans in the Battle of Sekigahara?'

Usagi had no idea. Serenity sighed '

Toyotomi Hideyori'. Usagi answered. Saito-san stopped in his lecture to give her approving look.

"That is actually right." Before continuing on.

'How did you know that?'

'He just said the name a second ago. I hadn't had time to forget it.'

Ami gave her an approving smile.

'This is just unfair.' Usagi went back to staring out the window, entertaining fantasies of a delightfully large picnic.

Eventually the class ended and off to Physical Education they went. They had been assigned a three week block of swimming PE starting today. Usagi quickly discovered Serenity did not swim, and had a incredibly strong aversion in being in a body of water she could not stand in. Usagi had to fight Serenity's convinced belief that they were going to drown off for half the class until she relaxed enough to trust Usagi to continue to swim as she had been doing anyway. Usagi wasn't a graceful swimmer, but she also wasn't going to die. This had made PE a million times harder and raising her stress levels at least tenfold. A fun hour became an intense amount of work.

The afternoon revealed Serenity had a great perception of the general concepts of economics, and took interest in the current political landscape of modern Japan. Usagi generally found this very boring, but Serenity was able to pull examples and compare in ways that were fascinating.

Usagi had barely made it out the door when her communicator beeped, when all of their communicators beeped.

Usagi scrambled digging through her backpack then pushing a button on the little videophone pad. Sailor Mars looked distracted, eyes not looking at the screen.

"Youma! Use my location get here soon!" Fierce growling was heard before the communicator went blank. Ami announced the location as two blocks from Rei's school, and they started to run in that direction.

Serenity wasn't use to running towards danger- she'd always been isolated, hidden, pampered in tension unless it was a negotiation table. She became more alarmed when people started running away from the danger, a sure sign they were close. A pit in her stomach formed when she saw a hideous towering creature, skin wet- slick like oil, sharp silver claws and many- far to many red eyes. It looked like an elongated disfigured shadow come to life. Rei had been throwing fire at it for awhile, which seemed to just make it growl and then throw spikes. Against each other, they seemed ineffective, neither able to harm the other.

Usagi transformed. Serenity had never felt the power of a senshi transformation- which was shockingly raw, buzzing high feeling punctuated with fear. Usagi was really going to jump into this?

Then Usagi did. Serenity's opinion of Usagi shifted, but there wasn't quite time to consider it because projectiles are sharp, which Usagi avoided with ease. But Serenity's thoughts were strong and distracting, Usagi kept having to focus.

Somehow sailor moon was separated from the other senshi and had run out of space to back away, finding herself against a window to a local store. She gripped her moon rod to start to destroy it.

It's scream was deafening, it's long spiked teeth and beedy far too numerous eyes turned to focus on her swinging it's clawed hands throwing spiked darts in her direction.

It's large size and slower movements should have given Sailormoon plenty of time to respond to the not so unique spiked object attack towards her.

But Serenity froze, rooted to the ground even though usagi pretty much commanded their body to jump.

Serenity shut her eyes but the spikes never hit, instead blocked by a intercepting tuxedo savior.

He grunted with the impact into the the spikes dissolving. Simultaneously the inner Senshi threw multiple attacks.

For Usagi/Serenity, the fact the monster was distracted by the other Senshi was important because all of their attention was on Tuxedo Kamen, laying on the sidewalk groaning. Cape ripped, clearly bleeding from his back.

"Are you okay?!"

Serenity knelt down in panic (she was not losing him again was the only thought running through her mind), and he looked up at her intensely "Attack it now!."

Serenity looked at the monster filled with doubt. How could she do this? Usagi was trying to regain control, this was not the time for this.

"Serenity, stop panicking and let Sailor Moon fight!" _How did he even know?_

Serenity took a deep breath and Usagi pulled on the power of the Silver Crystal by raising her Spiral Heart Moon Rod towards the sky.

"Rainbow Moon Heartache!"

A flash of pink light and the monster dissolved into dust. Usagi, after countless battles expected the pulls of exhaustion of throwing her battle attack but Serenity definitely noticed, not hiding a bit of a sway. She felt like she needed to sit down, but steeled herself on focusing on what was most important: Endymion.

He'd stood up, shaking himself off. "You're hurt." She whispered, stepping up close up him placing her hands on his crisp white dress shirt. Without thought, her hands started emitting a white healing light. Her mind flashbacked to what seemed like just days before, him dead, Beryl laughing, kingdom in just as much dust as that monster.

He looked down at her, Usagi just a tiptoe away from a kiss, but instead he gently spoke "I'll heal. Don't worry too much." He removed her hands, holding them in his own. The light disappeared and she suddenly felt flush as her fingers intertwined into his strong hands. "But you need to focus." His tone was serious and concerned.

Serenity's fear turned to rage: physical distractions be damned. She took a step back.

"Don't tell _me_ what to do! I just got here!"

Then she turned on the four Senshi. "Which one of you thought it was a good idea for Usagi to fight in the first place? Are you lot INSANE?"

"Your transformed, don't use her name!" Came Minako's instruction. Minako was looking around, a civilian audience was gathering now that the coast was clear. "Let's move and we'll talk in a few minutes."

A few minutes later, they were all back in civilian form and sitting on the steps of the Hikawa Temple.

Serenity turned the bracelet to silver side up, she found that having something to symbolize _her_ in this world felt validating.

She looked at Mamoru who was leaning against the temple wall- he looked suave and distracting. She ignored that. "You cannot protect me like that ever again."

He shook his head no. "We have had this conversation in two lifetimes, and the answer is not changing. You get protection. It is just the way it is."

"But...there isn't a kingdom to protect! I'm a princess of rubble!"

Mamoru was about to respond, but Minako beat him to it. "You have the Imperium Crystal, and we will protect you. It is our sworn duty."

"You don't know anything about your duty! And it doesn't matter. We failed!"

Mamoru looked at her pointedly. "This world deserves protection. Our protection, Your protection. Would you leave this world to Metalia?"

"I ALREADY DID."

"Then why are we here?"

"How am I supposed to know why I'm on this godforsaken planet!"

"Because Usagi was told exactly why. Listen to her."

Serenity paused, flitting through her inhabitant's memories until she found the ones of her mother? The hologram of her mother? Usagi wasn't sure.

Sacrifice. The only hope.

Then why didn't she feel _any_ hope at all?

* * *

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Please Review!


	4. Chapter 4

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A/N: So, turns out I’m incorporating some shinto beliefs and ceremonies- I’m trying to do this respectfully through research . If you feel that there is something specifically off, Please tell me so I can fix it! *Please note that Shinto weddings really didn’t occur in the appropriate time period- so that is artistic liberty.

CHAPTER 4

Serenity shook her head out of her thoughts and Usagi’s memories, refocusing on inner senshi in front of her. To her they looked so, young- so readable, unlike the tight lipped counterparts who were far more expressive behind closed doors than in normal conversation. Their reactions, the eye widening, small nods or shakes of the head, the little furrows of confusion were absolutely obvious. Serenity knew her outburst had them off kilter, more use to her enthusiastic- optimistic counterpart not consumed with the obligations of position.  Then pivoted her conversation to the next important topic on her mind. She asked the group, “Do you understand the implications of Usagi using the Silver Crystal to fight? That her powers are fundamentally not like your powers?”

“What do you mean?” Ami asked, looking startled. Luna was looking at her from Ami’s arms with a peculiar look - Serenity took it as wracking her memory for any hint at what she was talking about.

A thought flitted across Serenity’s mind about the irony of an an advisor with no actual knowledge, but focused on explaining. “Regardless of its importance, the moon is just a satellite of earth. Your magic is planetary magic. Essentially guardians are chosen to have access to it. The Henshin stick is like a well- you draw from your source. The Silver Crystal just isn’t like that. It works by drawing on lifeforce, by amplifying litteral energy of the person that is using it. The more she uses it, the more intertwined the body becomes with the crystal. Which is why it is never used unless absolutely necessary.” Serenity started to hold the brooch in her hand looking down at it, surprisingly light for its size. It was beautiful, the jewels representing each planet around the larger silver crystal. She knew this was a possibility, but one she thought she would have to take willingly with deliberation, not thrown into it where the choice had already been made. This body was only alive because the crystal wanted it to be. The whim of ancient magic. The last few weeks had made her acutely aware of her own mortality.

“How do you mean intertwined, in what capacity?” Ami asked.

“It means, at this point, if somehow  We are not in possession of the silver crystal, we’ll die.”

_‘WAIT, WHAT?_ ’ Came the internal reply from Usagi.

_‘Too late, you made that choice!’_

Usagi started a rebuttal, but Serenity ignored her choosing to continue to talk to the senshi instead. “It also means that fighting for her, is different than fighting for you. From what I understand, Senshi can just keep throwing attack after attack pretty much as long as you need. You just keep pulling from the well. But every attack she does, literally is _draining her_.”

_‘Is this why I am so tired all the time? And they aren’t?!’_

_‘Yes, I’m afraid so.’_ Usagi mind swirled with all the arguments about how lazy she had been...but if she was actually different, what did that mean?

“There is no way we would have made it this far without her fighting.” Makoto stated, forward and honest.

Serenity nodded. “You were to work together with armies. You were never meant to fight alone like this. But, putting her into battle,  and using the silver crystal is short sighted at best. Especially with no heir”

“With no heir?”

“Traditionally, the user of the silver crystal already has a child by the time it is passed down, partly for assurances if something does happen- there is someone else to take over.”

Serenity could feel Usagi’s panic, and her eyes darting over to Mamoru who hadn’t actually responded.   _‘I’m not having Rini at 15. And, according to the future as we know it, I don’t have a child until I’m 22.’_

Serenity hadn’t quite meant it that way, and also was reminded that the gap between 15 and 20 is a large one. Yet, at the same time there were strategic implications that needed to be considered,and carefully weighed. _‘The future isn’t set in stone’_

‘NO, WE ARE NOT HAVING THIS CONVERSATION.’

Serenity instantaneously had a headache. Mamoru- or Endymion shook his head with a small smile as if being able to read the conflict going on in her head.

“What are we going to do with this information? We have an unknown enemy, ” Luna shifted the awkward conversation into much safer territory. It quickly turned into observations about the monster (there were few), that there hadn’t been any clues about what it was after. Ami stated that she would use the computer, and everyone would be on alert.

Serenity wasn’t sure what to say or do, so she simply flipped over the bracelet and let Usagi surface.  There wasn’t much to decide, and it was starting to get late. After affirming to be on the lookout and stay in touch, they went their separate ways. 

Friday came and went, Usagi yearning for some time to relax. She’d been shifting in her school desk, ready to bolt to the arcade, after a verbal challenge to defeat Minako at her game- Sailor V. It was going to happen today. Usagi was sure of it. The Bell rang, and Minako had already packed her bag (when did that happen?!) and gave Usagi a wink with a V sign, and was suddenly out the door. Usagi scrambled to stuff things in her bag to catch up.

It was _on._

Usagi sprinted after her, carefully dodging the far too many cars by carefully timing the walk signs at the crosswalks. Minako would laugh from a half block ahead with a smile and a triumphant kiss to the sky, before she disappeared in the sliding glass doors of the Crown Arcade.

Serenity watched internally, Usagi clearly had been holding back on the simple delights she had- caught in a myriad of thoughts of introspection: themselves, duty and expectations. But today, she was a kid...and somehow Serenity found herself...enjoying it? It was almost liberating. She allowed herself to ride the waves of joyful competition, watching as Minako provided teasing gestures and laughter. She was poking at Usagi who responded in kind.

Had she ever laughed like that?

They button mashed as little Senshi galloped across the screen, working together to stop pictures of enemies who inched forward in glitchy 16 bit motion. 

Serenity scoffed- when had these things become a game?

Suddenly, a little blue orb hit Usagi’s tiny sailor moon, who fell over sideways kicking its little legs. Sad music played, and Minako continued with a triumphant squeal. Usagi dug in her bag for another coin trying to find one before the countdown to continue ended.

Then someone covered her eyes (Serenity panicked), “Hey, Usako”

Usagi leaned back into Mamoru’s chest with a content sigh. “I thought I wasn’t going to see you today?” Usagi’s warm feelings of comfort to his touch, and Serenity’s interpretations of said touch were remarkably different. Clearly the sensation was the same, but Serenity read sensual where Usagi read comfortable.

He placed his arms around her, and whispered into her ear from above “Actually, I have a surprize for the both of you.” Serenity decided- definitely sensual. Usagi really didn’t have a _clue._

“Hmm? You do?” She spun around to look at him. Minako was still banging away at the video game, but was clearly paying attention to them. Serenity wondered How could Minako notice the charge between them and Usagi just not? He then handed her a white train ticket. She looked at it briefly. “Why are we going to Kyoto?”

“So you can relax, though  you seem to be doing a good job here. And, there is something Serenity needs to see.”

“In Kyoto?”

“Outside Kyoto, but its Something very old.”

“When??”

“Tomorrow morning, I’ll meet you at Tokyo Station, we take the Shinkansen Nozomi at eight am."

Usagi could barely sleep in excitement, which is the only reason they were even remotely able to make it on time. They spent far to much time (in Serenity’s opinion anyway) arguing about what would be right to wear to the trip. Finally settling on a Ankle length soft yellow skirt and a light blue spaghetti strap top, with a little white cardigan incase she got cold.

Mamoru had the polished casual look going for him: dark clothes modest, and neat. It was really the smile, fussy hair and purposeful walk that made him a treat to look at. He was holding something. Usagi ran up in an collision/hug, which he took in stride (though swinging her around a little to mitigate impact).

“Hey Usako.” Serenity thought how he said that was amazing, and it wasn’t even her name _._ Usagi and her were going to have to have a talk. Usagi just giggled. He handed her a bag “Breakfast” He stated “With reading.”  Usagi opened the bag to find two of her favorite things: pastries and manga. She squealed, but then bit her lip. “But, I didn’t get you anything Mamo-chan.”

“Today is all about treating both of you.” He smiled, “Come on we need to get to the platform or we’ll have to wait until the next one.”

“Soo… are we there yet?” Usagi tugged on his arm with a wink.

Mamoru gave her side eye. _Sexy side eye,_ profile of his face slight smirk with very kissable lips.   “We haven’t even gotten on the train!” She laughed, jumping the little gap between the platform and the train.

“What about now?”

They settled into seats next to each other, Usagi happily munching on flaky deliciousness while asking about how his week had gone. They shared light banter between talk about school, (prepping for college entrance exams is time consuming), Motoki’s silly antics and adventures of his pet turtle, and the woes of cooking for one. After awhile it fell into a comfortable silence, the scenery whizzing by.

Mamoru sighed. “Usagi, can I be honest?”

“Hrm?” She barely looked up from the shoujo-ai manga she was reading, currently enthralled in a suspenseful break-up of the main character.

“I’m trying to be serious here.”

Usagi closed the Manga, and leaned her head against his shoulder. “Sorry, Yeah?”

“I feel sort of guilty, that this time around it wasn’t like it was then.”

“What do you mean?”

“Like, in the past, when we met it was almost instantaneous, we were enamored with each other before we got through introductions. Here...I was so antagonistic."

Usagi laughed. “Mamoru-baka, love has different forms.”

“But...if Endymion hadn’t been around to tell me to stay, I... don’t know if I would have.”

“What do you mean?” Usagi looked kind of alarmed.

“I think I was so use to being alone...that inviting anyone in was just incomprehensible. And, then you showed up so...bright, cheerful, and joyful. And I just wanted to take you down a peg.”

“You tried, but I’m invincible!”

“It was really Endymion that encouraged me to stay around...and then suddenly you managed to find your way into my heart.”

“I’m glad you listened to him.”

The rest of the trip flew by in comfortable silence. Usagi stepped off of the second train, Mamoru insisting that the rest of the trip must be a surprize, as Serenity was going to catch on the second he mentioned exactly where they were going. This peaked both their interests. “Mamo-chan, I’m terrible with secrets, just tell me, I’ve been trying to figure out for hours!”

He smiled. “Here, you’re going to need these?” He handed her a little plastic bag with crackers inside. She read the green writing.

“Deer biscuits? Are we in Nara? I haven’t been here in ages...”

“So, Usagi, last time you were here, did the deer follow you?”

Usagi cocked her head to the side as they exited the station. “I...they did! I couldn’t get them to leave me alone and Shingo was all jealous and my mom took a thousand pictures and it was ridiculous, it was like every deer in the whole city followed me…”

‘They do that to me too’ Came the internal reply, though with far more emotion than Usagi expected. She flipped the bracket to silver side up.

“Are we really in Nara? _That_ Nara?”

He smiled, soft and warm, . “Parts of the Todaiji Shrine are still there, Ren.”

She almost dropped the biscuits. “Where we were married?”

“I knew you’d recognize it as soon as I said it”  She could tell he had been waiting for this reveal all morning, with the slight shift of his feet and the way his eyes conveyed so much expression. _How did he do that?_

She took a step facing him, making the space between them mere centimeters. “How could I forget?” She whispered, her voice revealing how meaningful this all was to her. They stayed that way for a minute, close, mesmerized by each other, falling into a deep kiss, not caring they were causing stares by those passing by.  

They strolled through the streets quiet streets of Nara, passing the hodgepodge of modernity and history. And every deer they came across approached her,nudging her hand with the top of its tan head, before wondering behind her. She soon accumulated a following. Usagi laughed, handing out biscuits to each and every one with a sweet hello, and a soft pat to the head, between their large ears.  

“Maybe you should have been named Tsukino Shikako.” Mamoru handed out another biscuit in one hand while holding Usagi’s hand in the other.

As they stopped to refill their biscuit rations, the store clerk commented. “You seem to have amassed a following, you must be special.”

Usagi shook her head. “They are just hungry, I’m sure of it.”

“No, I watch these deer every day.I’ve never seen something like this before. They are aggressive about food, but not like this. You must be blessed, or in need of a message.”

Mamoru handed the man some yen. “I think it is because she is an extraordinary person.”

Usagi stuck her tongue out at him. “I really don’t want all this attention.”

“That’s part of what makes you- you.”

The streets turned into beautiful green park, and soon Serenity found herself staring at the Tegai gate. The Tegai gate is a traditional japanese temple gate towering above, made of wood, 8 pillars and a large opening in the middle.

“How?” She looked at the gate, and at him, back and forth. He smiled. “It has just been here all this time.” Serenity noticed that oddly, it was Endymion who had less guarded expressions (such a contrast to the senshi), whose smile reflected more in his eyes. Though part of it could be that she just knew Endymion longer to be able to read him.

“I’m reminded every day how long it is been, but at the same time it feels so recent.” She leaned against him with a sigh. This weighed on her, and suddenly she found tears quietly falling down her face. “It's like the rest of it just magically appeared out of thin air, and this is the only thing that is the same.”

He nodded, wiping a tear from her face so gently, then tucking a blonde wispy behind her ear.

Within his eyes, she found herself lost in her memories of their wedding.

Serenity wore a traditional white silk kimono. She’d never thought she would be participating in a ceremony on Earth, instead of within her own kingdom- but it had been made clear that politically it was unacceptable. Serenity chose to forgo her traditions, trusting Endymion’s traditions for the ceremonial symbol of their unity. She needed this, needed it to be real.

Due to the secrecy, only Minako had come along with her on this trip, and she dearly missed the support of the others. Hiding such bonds from the Senshi of love was probably impossible, and having her onboard would allow for the advocacy of a future ceremony in her own kingdom.

The sun was rising in the east, the choice of day where the moon still hung high in the sky, the sunlight not bright enough yet to obscure its view. She breathed looking over the beautiful scenery, lush greens, soft trees, and the deer- always the deer, congregating around whenever she appeared. She breathed slow breaths, rehearsing vows in her head, when she saw a bright flash of light appear close by.

It only took a moment for her to see the flash turn into a figure, A tall figure with flowing hair and a silver-white dress, slowly walking with intention right towards them.

It could only be her mother. She panicked, looking at Minako who turned her eyes away. “You know I had to tell her right?” Minako whispered.

She’d planned just to announce it later, seeking forgiveness rather than permission. There was too many things for the Queen to weigh, and the princess knew this, not expecting her to break ancient rules for her own heart. That's not what ruling a kingdom was about. She swallowed, fully expecting to be pulled away by the power her mother wielded, forbidden. For her _protection._ For her kingdoms _protection._

Queen Serenity approached one step at a time, silent, grey blue eyes unreadable. Silhouetted by the rising sun, she glowed. Endymion stood off to the side, in his own Kimono,black and grey. He dared not to interrupt. She commanded the attention of everyone without words, with her grace, after all rumored to be a goddess, and Endymion could see absolutely why. Princess Serenity was sure that the wedding was not going to happen.

Serenity stood steps away looking at her young daughter, who dared not speak waiting.

And then Queen Serenity kneeled, to her knees, the only bow the princess had ever seen her do. The princess gasped, taking a step back.

“No, no, no” The princess wasn’t quite sure what she was protesting, but the power dynamic shifted and so viscerally real.

Queen Serenity stood, still not saying a single word, and pulled her daughter into a warm embrace, holding her tight.

She whispered “You have my blessing. May I stay?”

Princess wracked her brain to understand how her mother had suddenly allowed her to become adult, the implications of becoming her _equal._  Was this marriage or was this _ascension_?

Princess Serenity felt a wave of relief, confusion and she wasn’t quite sure what else flow through her and she nodded. “Of course, but don’t do that again.”

Queen Serenity smiled, wiping a tear from her daughters face. “I could not be more proud.” She kissed the crescent moon on her daughter's head.

She turned to Endymion, taking a few steps towards him and taking his hands.

“You must pledge yourself not just to her, but to both of our kingdoms, you understand?”

“I do. Your kingdom is my own.”

“Until your death?”

“I vow it.”

She let go of his hands, and kissed his forehead in a similar fashion. “I believe you have a ceremony to attend.”

Queen Serenity stepped back, nodding to the priest who watched their interactions without a word. Queen Serenity quietly approached the King of Earth, with a wordless nod, observing as well.

The actual ceremony went by so fast, the parts vague in her memory. After a ritual purification from the Priest, thanking of the gods/spirits, their wedding was announced, 3 cups of Sake exchanged symbolizing their unity. Then, the vows:

 

This person you marry

No matter the future

I will love this person,

Respect this person,

Console this person

Help this person

Guide this person

Until death

Protecting fidelity

I swear.

 

They stood there under the gate, offering a symbolic evergreen branch to the altar, thanking the gods for their opportunity of love. Then,  holding eachothers hands when Minako came up with the rings. They exchanged slowly, Serenity trying to keep her hands from shaking. After each ring was placed, Minako silently placed their hands in eachothers, removing her magical chain. She wrapped their hands together and with a kiss a jolt of energy flew through them. “You are forever connected.” The chain disappeared in their skin.

And they kissed while irrevocably joining their respective kingdoms.

* * *

  
  


As Usagi was reeling from the indescribable feelings from their shared past, in the present Serenity kissed  reaffirming their relationship, their power, their choices.  

 

“We are forever connected.” She repeated. He nodded, pulling her close, “Forever.” He whispered, kissing her again, with a strength that made her weak in the knees.  

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> PLEASE REVIEW

**Author's Note:**

> Please review!


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